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当前位置:首页 > 新闻 > 戒淫恢复 > 身体恢复 > 【大悲翻译官】为什么做不到停止看黄片?

【大悲翻译官】为什么做不到停止看黄片?

2016-11-25 04:11| 作者:amituofo | 来源:amituofo | 阅读:0次 |
WHY JUST "STOP LOOKING AT PORN" DOESNT WORKAllies,Partners,RecoveryTo someone who doesnt watch porn, or deal with an intense dependency, it seems like a simple fix:just stop looking at it. They see it

WHY JUST "STOP LOOKING AT PORN" DOESN'T WORK

Allies, Partners, Recovery

To someone who doesn't watch porn, or deal with an intense dependency, it seems like a simple fix:just stop looking at it. They see it as a choice, as a selfish indulgence, and that the viewer should just have more self control.

Unfortunately, for many, it isn’t as easy as it sounds. Few people are able to quit watching porn easily, but more often, the average addict can’t give up porn cold turkey, even if they wanted to. It’s a slow and uncomfortable process. For those of us who hate porn, the least helpful thing we could do is to expect them to walk away without some struggle.

What makes quitting so hard? Besides the very nature of addiction, there are a lot of different attitudes and mind traps that people fall into that continue the addiction and rationalize their porn use. An addicted porn user convinces themselves that they can’t stop, or they aren't actually addicted, or that they deserve the high that porn gives.

Let’s look at it from an addict’s perspective. Here are just a few mind traps that can set back the process of breaking free from porn:

I'm Different, I Can’t Get Addicted

[color=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961)]Everybody knows a person like this. This is the person who says, “I can handle it.” They’re the tough guy (or girl) who thinks that everyone else gets addicted because they are weak, or that addiction is a myth altogether. When a porn user has this attitude, they don’t accept the fact that no matter who they are, pornography is bad for them. This person doesn’t believe in porn’s ability to hook the most casual of users. Newsflash: porn use can never be casual, and it’s bad for everyone. Believing they’re smarter than porn only makes it easier to fall into the addiction trap. These users need to learn and believe the facts about porn and recognize that anyone can get addicted,and addiction is serious.

Cure Me, FixMe

[color=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961)]In some cases, it’s not easy for addicts to take responsibility for their own recovery. They don’t want to put in the hard work of developing self control or they don’t want to put in the work to stop. The “cure me” attitude allows someone who struggles to blame any slip-ups on incompetent therapists, "stupid" programs, or unsupportive friends—basically anyone or anything other than themselves. With this attitude, they never conquer their addiction because, truly, nobody can “make” them better. In the end, choosing to recover is up to the addict. They have to want to get better,and that can be hard. No one can convince them they need help if they don't believe it, and they don't own their own recovery. This porn user needs to realize their struggle as their own before they can make steps to getting better.

I Deserve It, I Earned It

[color=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961)]Everyone can relate to wanting a pick-me-up when they’re feeling low. Some addicts use this excuse to log on and binge-watch porn.They get a feel-good high that ends up throwing them into the addiction cycle.This may seem pretty harmless, but using pornography as a reward is only a set-up for more pain in the future because it only increases the addiction.Maybe they blame their struggle on low self-esteem and they desire the thrill that porn can provide, but it’s really the addiction taking over. This rationalization needs to be recognized for what it is: an addiction.



Stopping Addiction Doesn’t Stop the Desire

[color=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961)]Most people who manage to loosen the grip porn has on their lives never really forget the high it gave them.. Once you see an image or video, it can't be erased from a brain as easily as it can be erased from a browser history. The ability to recall these images makes it harder to recover and pretty easy to relapse. As supportive friends and family to people who struggle with porn addiction, we can encourage them to remain strong and remind them that they are loved and they are worth real love. We can act as accountability buddies, or help them realize that their struggle is real.

[color=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961)]Porn addiction is ugly. It tears apart relationships, and it damages a user’s brain, too. Porn isn’t good for anyone.We can take a stand against porn addiction by offering a helping hand of encouragement to seek help. Be a friend to an addict by recommending they sign up for a recovery program like Fortify.

[color=rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961)]Porn addiction is really difficult to simply get out of. Let’s fight for love and fight against addiction by offering help and positive words for them to stop instead of ignoring the hard reality of addiction.
 
为什么做不到停止看黄片?
盟友,伙伴,恢复
对那些不看色情片,或者可应对强烈(精神)依赖的人,这似乎是一个简单的修复:只是停止看它。他们认为这只是一个选项,一个自私的放纵,而人们只是需要更多的自我控制。

不幸的是,对许多人而言,它并不像听起来那么容易。很少有人能够轻易停止观看色情片,但更多的时候,一般的瘾君子不能放弃并停止观看色情内容,即使他们想这么做。这是一个缓慢和不舒服的过程。对于我们这些痛恨色情的人,我们可以做的最无益的事情就是期望他们毫无挣扎的离开色情。

是什么让戒瘾这么难?除了成瘾的本质,人们陷入了许多不同的态度和思维陷阱,使成瘾继续存在并合理化色情使用。一个沉迷的色情观众说服自己不能停下来,或者他们实际上并没有上瘾,或他们应该得到色情带来的高潮。

让我们来看看一个瘾君子的观点。这仅仅是少数可以重置摆脱色情过程的思维陷阱:

我与众不同,我不会上瘾。

大家都知道一个这样的人。这是那个声称“我可以处理它”的人。他们是硬汉(或女硬汉),认为一个人上瘾是因为他是弱者,或者说成瘾完全是一个神话。当色情观众有这样的态度时,他们不会接受这样的事实,不管他们是谁,色情对他们都不好。此人不相信色情有使人上钩的非凡能力。快讯:色情的接触绝不能随意,这对每一个人都不好。相信他们比色情更聪明只会更容易落入成瘾的陷阱。这些用户需要了解并相信有关色情的事实,并承认,任何人都可以上瘾,以及成瘾是严重的。

治好我,修复我

在某些情况下,这并不容易让上瘾者对自己的恢复负责。他们不希望投身于加强自我控制的困难工作或者他们不希望把这工作停下来。 “治疗我”的态度允许一些人把原因归咎于不称职的治疗师,“愚蠢”的程序,或不能提供支持的朋友,大体是任何人或任何事物却不是自己的任何闪失。在这样的态度下,他们从来没有克服成瘾,因为,事实上,没有人能“使”他们更好。最后,他们选择重新上瘾。他们必须决心变得更好,而且能吃苦耐劳。如果他们不相信,没有人能说服他们需要帮助,于是他们不会得到自己的恢复。这种色情观众需要实现为自己付出奋斗,才可以按步骤渐入佳境。

我应得的,我赚了

每个人都可能在情绪低落时想要一杯提神酒。一些色情成瘾者使用这个借口来登录和狂欢-观看黄片。他们得到一个感觉良好的高潮之后,又被扔到了上瘾周期。这看起来很无害,但使用色情内容作为奖励只会在未来带来更多的痛苦,因为它只是增强了瘾症。也许他们指责自己同自卑的斗争,他们想要色情提供的刺激,但是这真的让他们被成瘾接管。这种合理化需要被认识到它是什么:一种瘾。

停止成瘾不会停止欲望

绝大多数尝试松开色情在他们的生活中的人从来没有真正忘记色情给他们的高潮。一旦你看到一个图像或视频,大多数人来说,它不能从大脑中如同从浏览器被删除历史一般轻易抹去。回忆这些图像的能力使得它们更难(身体)恢复且很容易复发。作为与色情拼搏的人能够提供支持的朋友和家人,我们可以鼓励他们继续保持强劲,并提醒他们,他们被爱着,他们值得真正的爱。我们可以作为问责的哥们,或者帮助他们意识到自己的奋斗是真实的。

色情成瘾是丑陋的。它撕裂了人际关系,也损害观众的大脑。色情对谁都不好。我们可以站在打击色情成瘾的立场,通过提供鼓励寻求帮助的援助之手。通过推荐他们参加像Fortify这样的恢复程序而做成瘾者的一个朋友。

色情成瘾真的很难简单地走出。让我们为爱奋斗,通过向他们提供帮助和积极言话使他们停止成瘾而不是用忽视成瘾的残酷现实来代替。


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